Sunday, March 28, 2010
PSA: We’ve Been Cyber-Lumped
We usually try to avoid all fandom drama and hysteria, but unfortunately every once in awhile people shove you into it. We were totally shocked when one of our forum regulars sent us a link to a blog post at Letters to Rob on Friday where UnintendedChoice used an incident with a psycho shipper to draw us into the situation, and lump us in with insane people. Oh no she didn’t…
Dear UnintendedChoice,
We’re sorry some crazy bitch said mean things about you on the Internets. We heartily agree that posting someone’s real life picture and then saying derogatory things about their appearance is disgusting and reprehensible. Although we were amused by your reaction to it considering you’ve done the same thing to Kristen Stewart on more than one occasion.
Your picture has never been posted on either of our sites, and after our staff did some looking into it we’re pretty sure the lunatic who did it isn’t one of our members. Although of course it’s possible she is. It’s hard to keep track of almost 3000 registered users.
You call us crazy. If being fans of both Rob & Kristen, and becoming tingly over the thought of them as a couple makes us crazy…so be it. If you knew anything about what goes on at our forum or blog you would know the kind of “crazy” you reference isn’t tolerated around here. Sure, shipping any real-life couple is a very fine-line to walk. However, we’re doing our best to keep it sane, respectful, and free of hate.
A direct quote from your blog:
“Yet they would NOT like you if they met you because you’ve speculated, spilled private details & invaded their right to have private lives outside of the limelight.”
That’s an interesting statement. We’re curious, does selling pictures you took without their permission of them leaving a concert to the tabloids fall under that description?
Regardless of how many reasons you’ve given us to speak ill of you (and there have been many reasons) we have never done so. Partly because it’s low-class to talk shit, and partly because we love a few of your friends like fat kids love cake. So considering we had nothing to do with you being “cyber-bullied”, nor any of this other drama, how about we just go back to ignoring each other’s existence? Cool?
LMAO I fucking love it!!!!!! That was great…You ladies are the best…RLC is one of the few sane forums out there…and it because of you all. Keep it up…fuck the haters…
*GASP* Somebody said something mean about you? Something untrue? The nerve! Love this post, very proud of you
hehe
I'm sorry..someones been needing to tell them this for a long time..the very things they accuse others of are the very things they are themselves guilty of..I will not say turn abouts fairplay..thats just childish and immature..but I will say you reap what you sow.
Good point. Thanks for posting this!
"That's an interesting statement. We're curious, does selling pictures you took without their permission of them leaving a concert to the tabloids fall under that description?" – so many people are asking this question
WELL SAID! i couldnt agree more!
and so true RL is one of the best forums beacuse we all RESPECT others opinions .. we dont hate and we dont humilliate people!
im so proud to be a member! <3
I actually know of the person who took the pic from the twitter account. Idk why they had to spread it to Kristen fans. I admit I was laughing at that pic like everyone else, but IMO anyone who spits hate, deserves to get spit back.
It wasn't cool for whoever it was to circulate that pic out of retaliation to the nastiness that has come out of nonsten.com.
And LTR had a right to say, "Hey, wait a minute…" I'll give them that much.
That said, they are supremely hypocritical in their "woe is me!" post. I get it. They don't want to be made fun or bullied. Yet, they and their regulars at LTT and LTR have regularly targeted Kristen Stewart for their own special brand of toxic cyber-bullying that helped create an atmosphere that made the creation of nonsten.com seem like some kind of logical step.
So, yeah, it was NOT cool for that picture to be circulated, my sympathy for them is tempered by the fact that there is a lot of things that they've said on their blog about Kristen Stewart that is also NOT cool.
But I think that's a lesson in all of this that will go unnoted by them.
More's the pity.
*claps* well done
Oh, shoe, meet other foot. Not a great feeling, is it? Sorry this happened to you, LTT/LTR, but you really shouldn't have lashed out at RLC. Two wrongs don't make a right, though, so I'll just say, let's keep it classy.
We're all about the love here at RLC, and I'm proud to say that Cee and the mods have been nothing but honest and fair about everything.
Lots of love to you ladies.
xoxo
Dana
hey you know what? yeah I've seen the picture…yeah people said that they're all nonsten…yeah all nonsten people ARE ugly…INSIDE…and it shows…OUTSIDE…and I'm not talking about the 1, 10, 20, 40 extra pounds they might have or the color of their coats! people that spew hate against innocent people deserve it every now and then to be put in their place! if it makes them shed a couple tears, then ALL THE BETTER!I can't even begin to imagine all the tears Kristen's mom would shed if she saw all the hateful things are said about her only daughter!
unfortunately, it happened that not ALL the people in that picture spew hate towards Kris on a daily basis, wishing her death by overdose, commenting about her "greasy hair" (in photoshoots where they use hair and make-up artists no less, so I imagine her freshly washed hair was very oily NOT! LOL)making derogatory avis they use in their signatures, including most of them of Edward and Bella (way to respect Rob's work…I really do believe Edward doesn't like Bella either, right?…:/)
So anyway, to all those girls that are in fact respectful of Kris (whatever her relationship status is to Robert – I for one am not a shipper, I'm a believer…I don't WANT Kris and Rob to be together in my fantasy world, I KNOW Kris and Rob are together in their REALITY) – I've already expressed my apologies for what I might have said in a heated moment or two…but to the rest? give me a break! people that spew hate on a daily basis should be prepared to take the hate coming their way on a daily basis too! this hate thing is a 2 way street!
I find it most disgraceful to come forth and say "we're only having a forum where we make fun of the shippers theories and see we're actually the voice of reason, because we come up with logical reasons why Rob and Kris are actually not a couple…there are people that don't like Rob there too…bla bla bla"! nonsten.com is ALL about hating Kristen! it's all about making fun about an innocent 19yo that happens to be in a relationship with one Robert Pattinson! So yeah, they make fun of shippers on a daily basis too…but you see, it's not on twitter(oh yes they do…I've seen it), and they don't make fun of their pictures (oh yes they do, I've seen it…pictures of sheep and avis of sheep smell anyone?) …they only insult their intelligence on a daily basis…because that's way better… *rolls eyes*
Aaaaanyway, bottom of line, things like these will always happen…it's a fandom driven by women, and women like to comment on other women…deal with it…it's not like you can change anything!
And another thing…if you're gonna spend your family time on some online activity…focus on spending it on LOVE not HATE! having a forum and commenting all day long about how much you hate a human being and all the people that love that human being is a total disgrace and waste of time!
This whole situation is ridiculous. When someone wants respect, he/she should own it. Yes, everyone is entitled to have their opinions about any matter in life but it becomes a serious issue when they openly bash as a daily basis someone (I've seen the comment which "supposedly" threatens Kristen).
I really feel sorry for those people, I know it's not cool to be bullied (believe me, I've already been through that) but if they did not wanted to be depreciated online, then they should not have depreciated Kristen first.
People should stop with this "war" in the fandom, Haters vs Robstens vs Nonstens vs Delaney. This is getting way out of proportion!
That's it, no more rant for me,
aff3r.
p.s.: I never got the chance to say it but… Thanks C2R and Chonga for creating (and for keeping it that way) a truly respectful and sane forum.
Its a shame people feel the need to make derogatory comments. I think it's great you stood up and said something. People need to stop the HATE is right because they really wouldn't want people acting that way. Either of them.
WORD! Amazing post C2R…..thanks to you and everyone else running this forum, we have a sane and calm place to express our love and support to RPattz and KStew…..and thank you for that!
xoxo
Way to go! <3 this post!
X
If being a part of RobstenLove.com makes me crazy, I'm ok with that! We've all had moments where maybe our reply wasn't the best one, it's human nature. But there are others who continuously cross it and then want sympathy. Have yet to see them ask for forgiveness for such hatred. Golden Rule people, golden rule.
LTT/LTR forums were the training ground of the Non-Stens..they were spawned there.The moderators/owners of the site encouraged them so deal with the consequences.
You reap what you sow!!
There´s nothing to add, except for
<3 Robstenlove.com!!!
*sigh*
( I love you Cee )
Sometimes this fandom is really scary …
And that's exactly why I chose to stay out of it.
I prefer the perfect bubble of the RobstenLove forum, full of funny, perv', smart, respectful ladies … and Chant
We don't do hate, our time is much more precious than that.
Caring, loving and lusting are very time consuming … And boy do we love these two birds ^^ We really don't have enough time for anything else
S.
Its a shame really, the comments made about the nonsten pics were harsh but how is that any different from what they do to Kristen? Is it okay to bring her down yet when they get a taste of their own medicine they are upset and you naturally would be as its cruel. I hope they learned from this and realised that cyber bullying a 19 year old girl they do not know personally is unacceptable. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but you don't need to state your opinion in an offensive way.
I'm just tired of the nastiness. I'm tired of entire sites being used to pick apart Kristen. I've heard people say well this is just what women do or "it's just sarcasm." I agree being bullied or picked on isn't fun, we've all been there. So my question is why is it ok if the person is famous? No one is forced to like anyone. But devouting entire sites to hate or encouraging hate in your comments is sad and quite honestly says a lot more about who you are than the person you are discussing.
I can honestly say that I was one of those who overreacted when I first saw the "Nonstens" picture I did not call these girls fat or ugly but did say that it was nice to put a face to the haters that post at the AT boards and I did say that who are they to judge.
Yes I regret saying that not only b/c not all those girls were bashing Kris but b/c it makes me just as bad as those who do.
I personally think that LTT was where the bashing of Kris started and is a brewing ground for hate. Maybe some can see the humor in that type of thing but I can't.
I just find it sad that woman feel the need to bash other woman instead we should be celebrating each others accomplishments.
KMDawe
WOW, where have I been? But seriously…"spilled details"? As if?!! Way to go RL!!!!! <3
-chicky
love you bitches. <3
There is nothing but love for Pattz and Stew in RLC. The hate over there is insane (from what I have heard). What a sad life to bash on a 19 year old girl that is already so much MORE that they will EVER be.
Thank you for saying all this. I was one of the few that got called out on Letter2Twilight's twitter for RT'ing a damn pic. I never said anything horrible about the ladies in the pics just RT'd it and they felt the need to bring me into this. What UC fails to say in her little write up, is a Nonsten (that posts at Nonsten.com)took the pic from someones elses Twitpic account and posted it before anyone else did. Anyways its done and over but thanks again for saying all this.
Great post guys. Like many of you I live in a bubble when it comes to Robert and Kristen and just tune out any negativity that comes their way. In saying that, I haven't heard all of the things that have been said about Kristen, I choose not to, because I feel that if people want to criticise a 19 year old girl, who is just doing their job, must have too much time on their hands.
This needed to be said. Thank God we have a forum that allows us to respectfully (and maturely)support both Rob and Kristen.
Robstenlove.com is a well moderated site that filters hate and prevents the 'crazies' from posting unnecessary shit.
Thank you!!
I stay away from boards like that because of the obvious fact that they would take their own sister down if need be. Anyone who spends that amount of time talking about how much they hate someone… well… waste of perfectly good internet space.
This board has done nothing to deserve to get called out by anyone. I am so proud to be a part of a board that promotes something positive.
Way to stand up for us at RLC! Hearts xoxo
it's like they say…'karma is a bitch!'
Well done girl and thanks for the peace that is the forum!i love you for that!
Hearts***
Anonymous said…
I'm sorry..someones been needing to tell them this for a long time..the very things they accuse others of are the very things they are themselves guilty of..I will not say turn abouts fairplay..thats just childish and immature..but I will say you reap what you sow.
MARCH 28, 2010 12:14 AM
i so totally agree…
thank goodness for sane forums like robstenlove
am ever so grateful I bumped into this one and am enjoying my stay =D
Kudos to everyone in RL
and haters are just so lame and have nothing better to do with their lives =(
KARMA is a BIOTCH
I can't believe that RLC got dragged into this bullshit. This is one of very few fan sites that keeps drama to a minimum. I love you girls for all you do! xoxoxo
i'm a lurker at RLC (my lurking started over at the robsten thread on the LTR board last spring). I enjoy reading what everyone has to say but don't really have time to get involved. That said, I make a point to visit b/c of how very respectful everyone is and I am so grateful for how tight a ship the mods run. You all deserve major credit for creating a place that is all about the love and where negativity and hate are not tolerated. I am so appalled by the vitriol and rhetoric that is being spewed and concerned that it continues to escalate. As a woman I'm so saddened and disheartened that any other woman would go to such lengths so say horrid horrid things about a young girl they don't even know. I'd ask them to step back and consider how they would feel if it weren't Kristen, but their daughter/sister/bff who was being targeted by this same supposed "joking"??? It is hard enough to be a woman in this world, why must we tear each other down? The same goes for those who spewed stuff about that picture that had some of the nonstens in it. 2 wrongs don't make a right. Do I think it somewhat karmic? Yes. What you put out in the world comes back to you, and grown women should know better.
I believe LTR/UC owes RLC an apology for dragging you into this, that was an outright lie and horribly inappropriate. I doubt it will happen and I imagine the best case scenario would be as you said – to go back to ignoring one another. But that doesn't make it ok and kudos to you for taking a stand.
/rant
<3
-medelia
Love the post, love RLC, love all you sane people! Thanks for keeping it real. Those other loons must have pretty sad lives when they have nothing better to do than bring on the hate. I almost feel sorry for them, but Kharma is a bitch. They need to get a life, and quit trying to drag us and other innocent people down their dirty rabbit hole. The only one who'll get dirty is them. We are all about the love, support, and respect for Kristen and Robert. Thanks for giving us a sane, happy, crazy fun place to share our love! You guys rock!
K.
Great post girls and well said!! We love all of the sane people at the forum and it is because of you ladies that the forum just spreads the love for Robsten and nothing else. <3 Keep up the amazing work and know that I love you and so does the rest of the Forum Ladies.
<3
Kimbo
Wow…Glad I missed the drama and so pleased that RL admin contines to stay strong and true to thier word and not let peple get away with crap. Sending RL admin lots of love <3<3<3
"I can't even begin to imagine all the tears Kristen's mom would shed if she saw all the hateful things are said about her only daughter!
unfortunately, it happened that not ALL the people in that picture spew hate towards Kris on a daily basis, wishing her death by overdose, commenting about her "greasy hair"
Imagine how Robert's mother feels about having her only son treated the same way. Being called a manwhore or a drunk. Wishing that he would die in a plane crash on his way back to London. Saying he isn't good enough for Kristen & that's he a loser with no talent. Doesn't sound too appealing does it for the mothers?
I'm gonna get flamed for this I'm sure, but I can't resist defending myself when it seems that most are ready to make assumptions without checking the facts. First, apparently I made the mistake of meeting up with some very nice women in NY one weekend and allowing someone to take my picture. Second, contrary to popular belief, I had never heard of a Nonsten prior to last week. Third, shockingly, we never talked about R/K's relationship. At all. I know that's hard to understand, when members of both groups seem to spend their days debating this, but we actually talked about other things. Fourth, I was really appalled at how quickly people jumped on the "Karma's a bitch" bandwagon and began saying horrible things about me all over the internet. Now, I'm NOT saying that your members did this. But I'm attempting to put the word out there that I, for one, have never said anything bad about Kristen or Rob, nor do I talk about the saga in general. Since it has already been posted in the AT comments, feel free to check out my twitter, http://www.twitter.com/dancing_echoes. At this point, I wish I'd never heard of Twilight, Rob, or Kristen.
Please, don't assume that just because someone you don't like was sent a pic that they were not ever in, which was then stolen, that the rest of us in that picture should be condemned. I honestly didn't even get a chance to interact with a few of the women in that picture, but the ones I did get to spend time with were lovely women who did nothing wrong.
After reading the hate spewed around the internet by so-called Robstens and Nonstens alike, I've decided that it isn't worth being a fan of either side, and am no longer interested in what happens.
To: Anonymous,
The post here is not condemning the people in that picture. In fact, this post is condemning the fact that someone defaced that pic & broadcast it all over the internet. If you re-read the post, it says "posting someone's real life picture and then saying derogatory things about their appearance is disgusting and reprehensible." So I'm not really sure who your anger is directed at. RobstenLove.com and RobstenLoveTheBlog.com are against all the hate that is spewed all over the internet too. That's why this post was necessary. This posts makes no assumptions whatsoever. It comes from the fact that we were dragged into this dramz when really we, as a Forum/Blog had NOTHING to do with any of it in the first place. I'm sorry that you misunderstood what we were trying to say with this.
Thanks for replying, I was actually replying to some of the commenters who seem to feel that those of us in the picture deserve to be dragged through the mud because we might have spent an hour with someone who is a nonsten without realizing it. I honestly didn't check with those ladies who they thought an actor was dating because I really don't care who either person is dating. While I appreciate that the blog also finds these actions reprehensible, I'm attempting to get the word out that just because I met a Nonsten or a Robsten once without realizing it, I don't deserve to be lumped in with the craziness being spread.
@dancingechoes
Thanks for posting your thoughts. I appreciate reading your side of this. When we talk about karma here, we're not talking about you at all. We're referring to Moon and UC, the authors of the LTT/LTR blogs. They've done and said some not so nice things in the past, and now they're upset that the same is being said about them. I'm not saying it's okay to call them names, and I wouldn't call them names on the internet, but I think the feeling is that they sort of are getting a taste of their own medicine, and they don't seem to like it. JMO though.
Really, we're decent, normal, happy ladies (plus one unicorn, whom we love) and we just want everyone to get along.
Dana
I think UC's point was that she didn't care if the shiz got dumped on her, but she did care that people in the photo who have nothing to do with blogging got caught up in the drama.
That being said, thanks for the invite, but I don't spend my time talking about relationships I know nothing about….
Fair enough.
(But, just so you know, that's not all we do. We have discussions about all and sundry. It really is a fun place to hang out, but, like you said, it's not for everybody.)
Dana
Yeah, well she could have done that with about 10 less paragraphs and without using our name.
I cannot say that I'm sorry I missed all the drama. In fact I'm glad I did!
I hate it when cyberbullies .. YES, THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE BITCHES .. cry injustice and moan and complain when the brand of vitriol they spew on a daily basis gets flung back in their faces! And talk about crazy, all I can say is that it takes one to know one.
And one more thing UC, if know RLC AT ALL, you would know that fuckery is NOT TOLERATED HERE and the admins and mods are not at all emotional about throwing out or sanctioning any member who violates their very strict rules. Unlike your forum where you incite people to hate hate hate on Kristen with every bone in your body. You'd rather see Rob go all homo on ANYONE than have him end up with Kristen. Now, who's sick, huh??
So I agree with my ladies on ROBSTENLOVE.COM when I say GET OVER IT and let's go back to ignoring the other one exists. Ok?? Good.
As I would never choose to be a member of a site that takes glee in inciting the cyberbulling of a teenage girl which is exactly what LTT does. I come here not because of Robsten, but because it is the only online site that I have found that RESPECTS both Kristen and Robert. I am not Robsessed and I am not a Krisbian, I like them both.
I'm a little late to the party (jumped on your blog today because I know NOTHING that's been going on in Rob's world and thought I could see a few updates here!) but I thought I would respond to a few things said in response to my letter.
Firstly, the ONLY time I mentioned RobstenLove in my letter was when I said this:
"Both sides played on LTT’s forum for awhile until drama ensued, big blow ups happened on both ends and Robstenlove.com & nonstop.com were formed. [UC EDIT: I mean nonsten.com obvviousssly] Moon & UC breathed a sigh of relief that the crazy was no longer our responsibility"
Here I was just starting a fact- that nonsten.com and robstenlove were two sites that came out of people who used to chat on our forum. I'm sure reading "the crazy was no longer our responsibility" may have offended you, but let me qualify what I said- after spending WAY too many nights dealing with "drama" between the sides and reading through "she said/she saids" on BOTH threads until 2 am when I had to be up at 6:30 am and getting DMs from people offended on both ends, I think "crazy" is the only term I can possibly relate to what that experience was like for Moon & myself. Were the "crazies" a minority on both ends? Sure- I bet they were. And I go on to clarify WHO I am talking to in my 'rant:'
"Robsteners (and I don’t mean the ones who like Rob & Kristen together and end it there) & Nonsteners (and I don’t mean the ones who don’t like the idea of R&K; and end it there)? I’m talking about the people whose lives depend on the proving the validity of Robsten or the pursuit of showing its falseness. You are crazy."
I have become close friends with people who would call themselves Robsteners as well as some who might say they are Nonsteners. They are NOT who I was talking to. I wasn't talking to RobstenLove.com or Nonsten.com or anyone in particular. I was talking to the crazy people who brought innocent people into their drama. And I wasn't upset about how they brought ME into the drama- b/c I expect that running the blogs we do. I expect hate and my picture to be made fun of. Because of the nature of our sites, there's going to be controversy- just like you brought up in your letter- and Moon & I are very aware- just like we were back in August- that every decision we make has a consequence.
I never directed ANY of what I said towards you guys because I don't know anything about your site. I don't know if it's full of haters or if you talk about puppies all day long, and from what you said above & what many of the commentors said, it sounds like you run a really great, respectable site. And I'm glad to hear that because those of you I got to "know" through LTT, I really like.
So after a long comment I'll just recap and say- I never thought for one second RobstenLove specifically had anything to do with the awful things said to the sweet people I took a picture with. I KNOW who said those awful things and I know WHY they did. My "rant" was to them and to those who drove them to what they did. You were never meant to be "lumped" in with the people I was talking to just because I mentioned where the site originated from, and I'm truly sorry that that is how you felt it was written.
xo,
UnintendedChoice